How to Avoid a Car Crash (and a Life of Regret)

This concept is solely responsible for many deaths.

Instant death by car accident, but also slow and painful death by living a feeble life.

But it’s avoidable — a mindset that can be changed.

Those who don’t change are playing Russian Roulette with the world.

Avoid car crashes, and avoid a life of regret, with this simple theory.

I let him hold my life in his hand

I was driving home from basketball — I was trailing a car as we approached a red light.

Just metres from the other car crossing the line, the light went yellow.

He was too close to stop, so I assumed he’d go through — and I kept my pace accordingly.

But suddenly, with a loud screech, his car fishtailed to a halt.

I slammed the brakes too and came inches from hitting his car.

Why didn’t you go through? You almost killed me! — I thought to myself.

But I was wrong — and in that moment I realised the near miss was completely my fault.

He didn’t almost kill me, I almost killed myself.

Never sit in the blind spot

“Expect the best, plan for the worst, and prepare to be surprised.” — Denis Waitley

In motorcycle school, you’re taught never to sit beside a car matching their speed — you might be in the blind spot.

If they don’t see you, don’t indicate correctly or don’t shoulder check thoroughly — they won’t see you.

Yes, the accident would be their fault — but it doesn’t matter whose fault it is when you’re dead.

You’ve put yourself in a position where you’re at the mercy of someone else.

Are you comfortable with that? Are you comfortable leaving your life to the chance of whether or not they do all the right things?

Key lesson: Never leave your life to chance.

• Leave extra distance just in case they hit the brakes.
• Do not turn onto a street if a car is even remotely close — even if you might have just enough time.
• Never trust the indicator of someone going through a roundabout — assume they’ve made a mistake.

Being safe isn’t about making zero mistakes.

It’s about putting yourself in a safe position, so you're ok no matter what unfolds — mitigating risk.

Because when the margin for error is so small that your life depends on another person’s actions — you’ve already lost.

Accepting responsibility and taking control of your life

“A prudent person foresees danger and takes precautions. The simpleton goes blindly on and suffers the consequences.” — Proverbs 27:12 (NLT)

When you assume, or expect, you relinquish control.

That’s why the Trojans can’t blame the Greeks for infiltrating Troy via the giant wooden horse. They can only blame themselves for not being cautious.

You need to release dependence on external circumstances and take responsibility for your fate.

If you rear-end a car because they slammed the brakes, that’s on you for not leaving an adequate distance.

Once you approach life with this mindset, you take control of the outcome. You take matters into your own hands.

Because what kind of a life foundation is so flimsy that it relies on other people doing everything perfectly for you, and everything unfolding with no issues?

When you blame other people, or the world, for your bad situations, you’ll continue to live a miserable life.

You deflect responsibility to make yourself feel better — to make yourself feel like it’s not your fault.

I only got fired because of the stupid new young person! — No, you got fired because you couldn’t keep up with the emerging trends. You weren’t prepared.

You got yourself fired.

A life where you deflect responsibility is hollow.

It’s like constructing a high-rise building on paddle-pop sticks, and when someone flicks the sticks and the building collapses — you blame them.

How foolish!

Engineers design columns so that they can get hit by a car and still stand — not just hold the building up.

They accept responsibility, plan for things to go wrong and design accordingly.

And that’s what you must do with your life.

Don’t leave it up to others to decide your fate — go out and decide it yourself.

Summary

Don’t leave your life to chance, to external things going right all the time.

If you expect every car on the road to drive perfectly, every person in your life to fulfil their duty perfectly, and everything to go to plan, then you’re just like the vulnerable motorcyclist sitting in the blind spot.

Instead, release your expectations of the world.

Expect the worst, and you can take the adequate measures to ensure you’ll be unaffected no matter what the outcome.

Because people and things will go against your ideal conditions — that’s the stochastic nature of the world.

You should plan your life in a way where you’re covered no matter what goes wrong. Leave wiggle room, room for error — just as you’d leave a gap to a car in case they hit the brakes.

Thank you for reading!

I’m Eren and I use stories from experiences in my life to explain self-improvement — and how you can change your life but just changing your thoughts.

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